Thursday, February 26, 2015
I’m re-learning to be better about self-care. I think I go in and out of doing a good job at this and I found myself falling into one of those not so good phases over the last year. I keep reminding myself lately that taking care of myself is not only helpful to me, but necessary modeling for my kids, so they grow up seeing the importance of loving ourselves in order to more effectively love others. I think I've written that before, but as I'm a slow learner, I guess I'm still telling myself the same thing. One form of self-care that I always need is candles. How very boring of me, huh? I typically get pretty inexpensive ones from Target, because I go through them fairly quickly. Vanilla is my go-to scent, although I have some others I like if I’m feeling fancy or seasonal.
Over the last few weeks, for no real rhyme or reason (annoying), I’ve been feeling a little fragile, and I’ve noticed that I start lighting the candles very early in the day. I wake up, tidy the kitchen and get the kids settled in the TV room so that I can get their breakfast ready. Next, I light the tahitian vanilla candle that sits on my kitchen counter, turn on the coffee maker, and take a deep breath. A sigh of relief. With candles and coffee, the world feels a little more manageable.
The thing about candles… I love a good smell. (When I wrote that last sentence, and every time I read over it, all I can think of is Ross saying, "And I thought to myself, wow, you know I've never owned a really good smelling pair of pants before." -in reference to the leather pants he just bought, and it kills Chandler to not be able to make fun of him for saying it, because of his New Years resolution. Anyone else think of that?! No? Can't stop, won't stop watching all the Friends episodes again.) It makes me feel like things are fresh and clean, even when they’re not, and let’s be honest, with a 3.5 year old, 1.5 year old, and cats, there’s generally a good chance that the house is not quite fresh and clean. In other words, we've usually got a nice funk at least somewhere in the house the majority of the time. I also like things tidy and I function better when they are, but I’m not always great at keeping it that way. I sometimes become overwhelmed with where to start on cleaning, but lighting a candle feels like the next right step and usually gets me going, whether that means starting some chore or just taking on the day and being more present with my kids, in the mess. I need pushes like this as I can get stuck in my head, and all wrapped up in my feelings. Those cheap, tahitian vanilla candles from Target act as a comforting and consistent form of self-care. What are some seemingly boring or simple forms of self-care that you must have?
And in keeping with recognizing the good, ordinary, and small comforts in my everyday, these pictures are my gratitude list from the last week.